November is here and with it a feeling that I don't belong. I feel lost again. Everyone has their group or their couple close friends that they hang out with all the time... I don't have that. Is it foolish to watch shows like how I met your mother and wish I had a close group like that? Why do I always find myself on the outside of circles. I have been trying to think of ways that I might repel people... I can't figure it out..

I am lonely and don't get me wrong. I love spending time with Tony and he is always there for me.. But he can't always be the one I turn to. Hmm.. Maybe I am just thinking too much. I just feel cut off from so many people that I care about and I didn't realize it until halloween.. Dammit.  

life  is what you make of it right?