I Will Try To Find My Place

I thought things might have been turning around. Apparently, I am unobservant. It's over now. Yet instead of crying my face off, I was just sitting here, calmly. While discussing the situation, I cried a few tears. But nothing serious. Waking up this morning, I nearly forgot all about it. Until I was fully aware of the day.

I know I need to work on myself, but suddenly, I don't have the motivation. In some ways I do... but not enough to push myself to make the changes. 

I am not quite sure what to think... I question even wanting to think. I just know I am going to miss certain things. Like having someone to play ds with on the seabus, skytrain and in bed (we were dorks, I know). I'm going to miss having kisses, but if I work on myself, surely, one day, there will be someone to give me the kisses I will be craving. I will miss his surprises. He surprised me so much this past week or so. Both good and bad. Mostly good ones. Until last night, of course.

Last night, before I left him, we were waiting for my skytrain, and we were kissing. I asked him what he called that kiss, and he would answer with "peck", "passionnate peck" etc, so I kept trying to change it up... then my skytrain came, and I asked "will you show me the goodbye kiss"

and he kissed me goodbye..

I honestly couldn't of asked for a sweeter goodbye kiss. At that moment, I didn't know it was the very last, but looking back on it, I am happy it was..